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In need of some serious advice
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Re: In need of some serious advice
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jinjin58
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Oct 28 09 9:28 PM
The ladies have given you some very good advice. I have found that my Dh can not handle having anyone be dependant on him. However when he saw that I am perfectly capable of taking care of myself and our son (actually I always had been), he then wants me to have to be dependant on him. It's a horrible push-pull. One that I have decided not to take part in any longer. I am in no way saying that is what you should do...just saying that is how it can go sometimes. In hindsight (we did not know he had PTSD until we were already separating) everytime he was having an episode...he would start talking divorce. He would also say that I could not make it without him. Funny because I was a successful business owner with a home for many years before I met him. He moved into my house and shared in the expenses. Shortly after I said I wanted off of the roller coaster, he didn't really want to go. My situation was different in that he was having an affair. He was not willing to give it up when I found out and would throw it in my face. To me that was a complete deal breaker. But when it came down to actually breaking things off he totally melted down. The sad thing is they really don't know what it is that they want. I do think somewhere deep down they do, but can't deal with the emotions of it, especially if they are not actively getting help. As the other ladies have said the best thing for you right now is to take good care of you and give him (and you) space.
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