Thank you all for your support. It has been an exhausting couple of days. His funeral is Tuesday - I am sure this will be a horrid day for me. The finality of it all will be overwhelming but knowing I have support helps. I just hope Mr. PTSD doesn't come out or we may have a serious problem. We have to travel 3 1/2 hours to get there and we can't leave until the morning of. So add stress onto rushing at 6 am and I may have a meltdown. I am really trying to stay positive but I am also realistic. Positive thoughts- I know- I will try. Thanks for being there for me - it means alot. I will keep all of you posted. Sorry to miss chat last nite. Didn't get home until late and then people came over with food and flowers for us - Nice thought but I don't have much of an appetite. Sorry I seems so negative - just struggling this a.m. A daycare mom really gave me grief over taking off work 1 day for the funeral. I got nasty with her so she may quit - really don't care - if she thinks that low of me after 3 years she can leave. Sorry I will type later when I'm not such a downer.