Hey....you can come ramble anytime! Venting rambling, screaming.....it is all apart of the process.

I think we have to be the blame because they see their own shortcomings. Being they are men they are to be the tough strong one in the marraige. When they have this feelings they are unable to overcome they feel weak, scared, and intimated. It is easier to attack your spouse then it is to work on you own problem.

You will never be able to change yourself enough to satisfy them in their conquer of running away from their own demons(PTSD). You can literally run yourself ragged attemting to be everything they think you ought to be. Eventually , You will succumb to the pressure feeling you have failed. It is not you whom has failed. It is them.

I was physically in the cycle you are in for many many years. I want to tell you I made every mistake one can make trying to be the best PTSD wife I could ever be. You will never be "good" enough. What works is being you........and that is hard to find when you are in the vicious cycle.

There is hope......there is always hope. This site is a wonderful place to start working on you. When you begin to work on you then you most likely will meet a wall of defiance upon his part. No use lying to you no probably about it.....you will fell like youn have hit a brick wall with dh.

You ask..."where are we"? You are in for the fight of your life withn something called combat PTSD. Learn all you can about it.....and then learn more.

Nakiea