Breathe,

I believe having the conversation you just had is a giant step.  I wish every day that I could have had that conversation 37 years ago.  Most of the Vietnam Veteran wives did not have a clue what was wrong... I married my dh three months after he returned fromVietnam.  I would have divorced him the first six months, except that was what everyone expected, and I was determined to prove everyone wrong.  Plus I was in love...
But I can tell you the man I fell in love and the man who came home from Vietnam was two different guys.  My dh was able to contain his PTSD... until 2 1/2 years ago, when a trip to Hawaii sent him into a major melt down.  At my wits end without a clue what to do next, I made a call to our local VA hospital.  He has been in treatment since that time.  He is now another different man, than the man I was married to for 35 years.  This is a hard stuggle for you both.  But the fact that he's talking about it is great.  Is he in treatment?  The Asheville VA hopsital is a good VA hospital.  They have a large Mental Health Department.  They treat all veterans, so your dh should feel comfortable going there for treatment.

I hope this will be beginning of better things for him and for you.  Keep coming here for support. This group is wonderful.

Have you or your dh read "Down Range to Iraq and Back"?  I had a counselor recommend it to me.  It's a short read and explains alot about PTSD.  In my opinion it's not as good as "Recovering From the War", but maybe he could relate to it and it's much quicker to read. 

Hollywood  

I forgive myself for having believed for so long that...
I was never good enough to have, get, be what I wanted.

Ceanne DeRohan