Well, I am VERY excited to report that after two days of not talking, DH made me a very thorough apology for his poor behavior and attitude! Wow! This is the first time he has been able to recognize it, so I am thrilled and hopeful that this means true progress and is not a random lucky break. Hurray! I can’t emphaize enough how relieved I am… usually this ends up staying a sore point… and now he has really been able to identify the issues in his own attitude and not blame it on me. I am so so so happy he is making such progress!
After everyone chiming in with their support and stories, I want to thank all of you… I do understand being frustrated over half-done projects. We have that too, although I have learned to accept it and we don’t fight over those, I can live with it. (Besides I procrastinate too!). It does drive me nuts at times though!
The situation DH run into that I was describing, though, is not about unfinished projects… it’s about planning major things together, such as a vehicle purchase, the budget allocations, fencing our land… it’s NOT things that DH needs to do himself. We do fine talking about it and making decisions in the abstract, but as soon as we start implementing our decisions, it’s as though DH forgets all about our decisions, becomes clueless, and decides it’s now “my” plan and if I ask for his input, I’m “refusing to take ownership”. It’s very hurtful and I get so discouraged… it mostly affects the big issues that you really NEED to make together when you are married, and so I end up feeling that we’d be better off single if DH insists that I make all the major decisions and gets angry at me for even wanting his input.

So that is why I am so glad that he really truly saw it this time around and said so clearly to me. I am so happy and made sure to show him lots of gratitude about it… ahem… anyway I am nervously hoping that this is the first step towards overcoming this obstacle. And the fence is finished and looks great!